Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Japanese aircraft carrier Ryūjō/archive1

Add links
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Ian Rose 10:01, 31 December 2013 (UTC) [1].[reply]

Japanese aircraft carrier Ryūjō[edit]

Japanese aircraft carrier Ryūjō (edit | talk | history | links | watch | logs)

Toolbox
Nominator(s): Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 17:44, 14 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Ryūjō was another attempt by the Imperial Japanese Navy to squeeze a quart into a pint-sized pot during the 1930s by adding more weapons and aircraft than could be safely borne by the hull as was proved when the ship was damaged in a typhoon shortly after completion. AFter modifications to improve her stability and general sea-worthiness, the carrier participated in the Second Sino-Japanese War in the late 1930s. During the Pacific War, Ryūjō supported Japanese operations in the Philippines, Malaya, and the Dutch East Indies before participating in the Indian Ocean raid, where she engaged Allied merchant ships with her guns, something that aircraft carriers of any nation rarely ever did. After her return to Japan, Ryūjō was assigned to support the Japanese attack on the Aleutian Islands while the main carrier force attacked Midway Atoll in June 1942. Her final assignment was to cover the Japanese reinforcement convoy to Guadalcanal after the Americans had landed there in August during which she was spotted and sunk by aircraft from two US carriers in the Battle of the Eastern Solomons. The article had a MilHist A-class review several months ago and I've tweaked it a bit since to bring it up to snuff. I look forward to working with reviewers to identify and fix any issues that might arise during the review process.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 17:44, 14 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support on prose per standard disclaimer. I've looked at the changes made since I reviewed this for A-class, and made one tweak. These are my edits. - Dank (push to talk) 02:43, 15 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for reviewing this so promptly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 03:20, 15 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Happy to help. - Dank (push to talk) 03:41, 15 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Source review - spotchecks not done

  • Source for 1936 characteristics?
  • FN2: no all-caps
  • Missing bibliographic info for Silverstone
  • What is the correct order for Hata's co-authors? Nikkimaria (talk) 22:49, 16 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • All fixed, including the additional material to source the 1936 characteristics.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:15, 21 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Image Review

--AdmrBoltz 01:00, 17 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments

  • The lead is awfully short. Shouldn't the fact that she was built to exploit a loophole in the WNT be mentioned?
  • "World War 2"? Roman numerals please.
  • A citation might be needed for the specific claim that Japan was trying to exploit the loophole. It shouldn't be difficult to add - IIRC Preston mentions it in The World's Worst Warships, which I have if you need it.
  • "No armor could be provided because of the need to keep Ryūjō's weight to 8,000 metric tons, although some protective plating was added abreast the machinery spaces and magazines, and her hull was lightly built." - this is a bit lengthy and the light construction bit seems tacked on.
  • "attacked the British heavy cruiser Exeter and only managed to damage" - would "...cruiser Exeter 'but' only managed..." make more sense?
  • Is there an alternative to "destroyed the Dutch destroyer"? "destroyed the destroyer" seems a bit odd to my ears. Maybe something along the lines of "destroyed HNLMS Van Ghent, a Dutch destroyer that had run aground..."
  • "starting its raid" seems a bit easter eggy. Perhaps it would be better to shift the link a little to the right -> "starting its raid in the Indian Ocean"?
  • Is "of the 1st Air Fleet" really necessary in the line about Jun'yo joining the 4th Division? It seems very out of place coming after the clause about the divisional commander.
  • Kudos for not repeating the nonsense about the Aleutians operation being a lure for the American carriers.
  • takeoff is one word, not two. Parsecboy (talk) 13:34, 17 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • All reworded or otherwise dealt with. Thanks for your excellent comments.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:15, 21 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]
      • Looks good to me, moving to support. Parsecboy (talk) 16:39, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support

  • Some duplicated links: bridge, superstructure, flight deck, hangers
  • The ship carried 2,490 long tons (2,530 t) of fuel oil which consider comma before "which"

Regards Hawkeye7 (talk) 05:49, 25 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support

Closing comment -- Generally I like to see a review from outside MilHist but HcHc's field is I think far enough removed from this subject to do the trick as far as checking for accessibility, avoidance of jargon, etc. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 08:02, 30 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Featured_article_candidates/Japanese_aircraft_carrier_Ryūjō/archive1&oldid=1138464461"