User talk:Pyrope

If you happen to be bored... go reference something

April 2024

Hello! I saw you undid my revisions on László Hartmann for being “boring”. I’d edited the text because the original was overly wordy and difficult to read, as well as being borderline opinional. It’s not about being boring, but sticking with the manual of style and making articles clear to readers. Poetic descriptions of sporting feats are fine, but they belong on social media or magazines, not Wikipedia. -- NotCharizard ^🗨 22:56, 28 April 2024 (UTC)

Hi Notcharizard, thanks for your message. There are a couple of things I'd like you to bear in mind here. First, you need to familiarize yourself with the WP:BRD process. It's great that you have an opinion on the best way to serve our readers, but I've found that reverting a revert is a surefire way to start an edit war. BRD certainly isn't mandatory, but it is the most reliable way to make progress.

Second, which parts of the MoS are your citing here? Justification that boils down to "per MoS" is a pretty unhelpful way of making a point. A lot of the words you removed contained information that you also removed, and that's not something the MoS encourages. Pyrope 14:12, 29 April 2024 (UTC)

Thank you be being so civil and explaining clearly! I appreciate very much. You are right in that I shouldn't just say "manual of style", that is good advice and I will do better in future. I've gone back through my edits and I agree that some of them were overly harsh in what I removed. Most of my edits were made based words to watch. Here are my thoughts:

Here are some specifics of my thoughts while editing:

- "soon graduated to a true racing car, buying [...]" I felt "true" was not neutral

- "Hartmann's reputation was growing and his prospects were brightening, but sadly for him his" emotional language, probably could be reworded rather than removed but I was unsure how. If there was a citation I wouldn't of removed it, but it's a big statement without a source.

- "was much confusion" WP:TERSE

- "would prove to be" WP:TERSE

- "Despite showing little aptitude behind the wheel while training for his road licence" I have restored this, but removed "behind the wheel" because of MOS:IDIOM

- "caught the attention of the Bugatti factory's eye" MOS:IDIOM

- "switch his allegiance" MOS:IDIOM

-- NotCharizard ^🗨 03:04, 1 May 2024 (UTC)