User:Slakr/Wikitheorems

Inverse speedy rationale

The length of {{db|a manually specified reason for speedy deletion}} is inversely proportional to the likelihood that the page will be speedily deleted.

Transference of conspiracy

The likelihood of being accused of being part of The Conspiracy™ is directly proportional to the amount of an article's text that covers either a conspiracy or controversy.

Conservation of deletion backlog

Attempts at reducing an administrative backlog that involves a deletion process tends to result in your talk page becoming backlogged instead.

Conservation of waves

Attempts by an editor at making waves or otherwise getting themselves noticed in a quick way (e.g., by nominating a popular template or policy for deletion) increases, by several orders of magnitude, the probabilities that the following destructive interference actions will occur:

• They will be blocked
• They will fail attempts at requests for adminship
• Other editors will reflexively think they're wrong in future discussions
• They will rage-quit