Talk:Vitamin E/GA1

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GA Review[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: Etriusus (talk · contribs) 04:04, 8 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]


I'll review this, always glad to see a Vital Article come through here. Immediately, I am worried about the handful of citation needed tags and the glaring number of sentences that are missing sources. I will keep the review open for now (until 12/15), since I am familiar with the general quality of your work, but I won't go much further until these issues are resolved. Once this is resolved, we can discuss a time frame for the rest of the page. I understand these topic can take time, vital articles tend to be a long haul. Thankfully, my degree is related close enough to this topic (Human Biology) for me to give a relatively technical review of the article. Etrius ( Us) 04:04, 8 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Please use a  Done, strikethrough or some other means of indicating an issue is resolved..

Images[edit]

  • File:Tocopherols.svg
  • File:Tocopherol, alpha-.svg
  • File:Beta-tocopherol.png
  • File:Gamma-tocopherol.png
  • File:Delta-tocopherol.png
  • File:Tocopheryl acetate.png

Technically, there is nothing inherently wrong with this copyright. That being said, a structural formula copyright (see File:Alpha-Tocopherol Structural Formulae V.1.svg) is more accurate. No other issues noted with the copyrights.

Copy-vios[edit]

  • I'll continue to make spot-checks as this goes on.

Earwig only flags 3-4 word proper nouns and phrases that really can't be reworded.

Sources[edit]

The missing citation issue has been raised above.

  •  Done Prasad K (2011). "Tocotrienols and cardiovascular health". Current Pharmaceutical Design. link should be added

Prose[edit]

  • All the external links have been checked, they are still live.
  •  Done The see also section should be cut, Tocopherol & Tocotrienol are already linked

Intro

  • Vitamin E deficiency, which is rare and usually... move to the end of the paragraph
  • '2,000 mg' convert template (ounces for all the Americans in the room)
  • 'The authors' either specify or generalize
  • Frankly, the second paragraph should go at the end. It is chronologically out of order.
  • Does the 3rd paragraph need to be on its own? It is a single sentence and works better at the end of paragraph 5.
  • Both natural and synthetic tocopherols... Move to end of paragraph
  • Specify in the beginning that there are 5 tocopheryles, 4 natural and 1 sythentic (tocopheryl acetate)

Chemistry

  • The nutritional content... move to later in the paragraph, it doesn't make sense to introduce a RRR configuration before explaining methyl groups, adding to the end would work.
  • R" sites You and I know what this means but specify this is a functional group. I can potentially read like its a chiral center
  • 'stereoisomers' If memory serves, this is not the correct term. I get what the page is going for, in respect to the tail, those specific segments are stereoisomers (enantiomers, diastereomers, etc). That being said the structures of each type of tocopherols, as a whole, are not isomers. Perhaps 'phytyl tail chirality' or 'stereochemistry' would be more accurate.
Furthermore, why is this its own section? Tocotrienols subsection breaks down the stereochemistry within its own section
  • 'reaction from continuing' be more specific. I assume Vitamin E acts in a fairly specific way as a reducing agent. I would help drive home the biological importance if more specificity of what the lipid radicals damage.
  • 'electrophilic mutagens' so, acids. Radicals, are generally electrophilic, seems a bit WP:TECHNICAL. This also implies these radicals act on DNA, which would be good to mention.
'unique properties' Technically, nucleophile-electrophile rxns are stupidly common, and by definition pretty much all radical breakdowns are nuc-ele reactions. The sentence as a whole sounds nice but isn't really saying much.
  • 'hydrophobic side chains' you mean unsaturated side chains, saturated side chains are also hydrophobic
  • Palm oil is a good source of alpha and gamma tocotrienols out of place sentence
  • two corresponding centers This should be reworded
  • There is plenty of space, why not add the 4 Tocotrienols' structures to the box?
  • which would have a 2S rather than 2R configuration at the molecules' single chiral center redundant, also a bit confusing since it hasn't been established prior that dextrorotatory = R.
  • unlike synthetic dl-alpha-tocopherol keep the terms consistent. Also, is this needed? perhaps saying an S config is theoretically possible but not commercially made gets the point across just fine.

Function

  • Vitamin E affects gene expression Needs to be expanded significantly. A cursory search has turned up a number of sources

Biosysthesis

  • chemical family of compounds made up of four tocopherols and four tocotrienols reword
are 'tocochromanols' the general classification for all vitamin E? Only in plants? This isn't clear why new terms are being brought up
  • and plants that through mutations have lost the ability to synthesize α-tocopherol demonstrate normal growth. reword sentence, order of ideas is confusion
  • 'normal synthesis capacity' specify
  • ' reverse is true' specify
  • 'same article mentions' not encyclopedic wording, needs to just be stated in a matter-of-fact way
  • 'Focusing on tocopherols' same as above
  • 'caustic soda' link
  • ' The synthetic has 73.5% ' The synthetic version has...
  • extra '</ref>'

Deficiency

  • nerve problems reword to neurological problems

Dietary recommendations

  • The Japan National Institute of Health.. sentence is clunky
  • ' is an outlier' could be misconstrued as subtle WP:POV. I don't disagree, still recommend rewording to make this wording is simpler

Overall, this section is very well written. I'd love to see more countries represented.

Sources

  • Worldwide, consumption is below recommendations according to a summary of more than one hundred studies... repeat sentence, cut the preceding sentence or reword.
  • common form found in the North American diet any other diets/continents?

Metabolism

  • 'vitamers' I feel like this an important term that should have been brought up sooner
  • and all of the vitamin E vitamers are metabolized and then excreted via urine. unclear on what this means. I assume this means un-excreted bile.
  • so this appears to be a means of disposing of excess vitamin E I would hope urine is an excretory process. Rather redundant info
  • 'chiral 2 site' 2nd chiral site reads better
  • A rare genetic defect of the TTPA gene results in people exhibiting a progressive neurodegenerative disorder known as ataxia with vitamin E deficiency (AVED) despite consuming normal amounts of vitamin E. Large amounts of alpha-tocopherol as a dietary supplement are needed to compensate for the lack of α-TTP repetitive, cut
  • As an example of a result of the preferential treatment, the US diet delivers approximately 70 mg/d of γ-tocopherol and plasma concentrations are on the order of 2–5 µmol/L; meanwhile, dietary α-tocopherol is about 7 mg/d but plasma concentrations are in the range of 11–37 µmol/L Info is out of place

Testing for levels

  • section is arbitrary. The info could be split between Dietary recommendations and Deficiency

Research Rename section to 'health effects' or something in that same vein

  • For the conditions described below... What is the purpose of this paragraph. It reads more like a disclaimer than a wiki article.
  • 'authors theorized' rephrase
  • This whole section seems to be going a bit too much in depth on the studies, especially the 'cancer' section. I get the need to explain but breaking down methodology isn't really necessary. Try to keep this focused on the health effects. As a whole, this section should be pared down
  • The European Food Safety Authority (EFSA) reviews proposed health claims for the European Union countries. As of September 2022,, EFSA has not evaluated any vitamin E and cancer prevention claims. missing citation


There are a number of instances where I'd love to see more coverage on other countries, or at least mention that other countries do not have dietary recommendations. On a broader scale, I am concerned that there is a no 'function' section. The Anti-oxidant function is buried in the chemistry section and the specific functions are spread amongst the entire article. This make it somewhat difficult to get a read on what Vitamin E actual does. This review was a beast but here are the first set of edits. I'll put this on hold but there is going to be some serious legwork ahead. Etrius ( Us) 05:02, 15 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@David notMD, any update? The review has been live for a week now and I don't see any progress made (assuming you aren't drafting something). Do you have an idea of when you'll get around to this? I understand that this is a long one and the holidays are coming up so I'm more than willing to accommodate. Especially with Vital Articles, I'd love to see them pass, but I do expect you to be actively working on it if able. If something is unclear in my recommendations, please let me know either here or in the talk page discussion. Etrius ( Us) 19:21, 22 December 2022 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.