Talk:Peace of Longjumeau

B class review 1

C class. I will approve this article for B class if the following issues are addressed. Thanks. Djmaschek (talk) 03:06, 6 October 2021 (UTC)

• Introduction. Foreign word: The word "Parlements" is a French, not an English word. It refers to a French political organization. Please use linked Parlement the first time and always use italics. Thanks.
• All article. Condé needs the acute accent throughout the article.
• Towards peace. Unknown term: Pyrrhic victory is a "victory that inflicts such a devastating toll on the victor that it is tantamount to defeat". There is no such term as "pyrrhic loss". If the royalists won a pyrrhic victory at Saint-Denis that does not mean the Huguenots suffered a "pyrrhic loss". Suggestion: "After their defeat at the Battle of Saint-Denis".
• Towards peace. Syntax error. "He further added that they had three days to lay down their arms, that while he would grant the ability for gentleman to worship in their households and liberty of conscience and property to be maintained. He would not allow synods, and would insist on keeping the crown at arms until the rebels had laid down theirs." Correct (remove "while"): "He further added that they had three days to lay down their arms, that he would grant the ability for gentleman to worship in their households and liberty of conscience and property to be maintained. He would not allow synods, and would insist on keeping the crown at arms until the rebels had laid down theirs." Also correct: "He further added that they had three days to lay down their arms. While he would grant the ability for gentleman to worship in their households and liberty of conscience and property to be maintained, he would not allow synods, and would insist on keeping the crown at arms until the rebels had laid down theirs."
• Towards peace. New sentence: "forces under Charles de Cossé however he was" > "forces under Charles de Cossé. "However he was"
• Towards peace. Not clear: "was sent to oversee the frontiers by Catherine de' Medici to better free her hand." It's not clear how this allows her to "free her hand". Free her hand to do what?
• Negotiations. Not clear: "that political marriages; between" > "that political marriages be arranged between".
• Terms. Please link these words: reiters and livres and Provence.
• Terms. Possessive: on nobles rural estates > on nobles' rural estates.
• Terms. Not clear: "In large part the edict was a return to the terms that had defined the previous edict of Amboise, however without the modifications that were made to that edict, when it was codified in the later edict of pacification, which had excluded more of the country from Protestant worship and officeholders." I understood this sentence up to "made to that edict". After that I got confused. What does "it" mean? ("when it was codified in the later edict of pacification"). Which edict are we talking about, Amboise or Longjumeau? What is the "later edict of pacification"? Please rewrite.
• I need to pause here. I will continue later.

B class review 2

C class. I will approve this article for B class if the following additional issues are addressed. Thanks. Djmaschek (talk) 03:51, 6 October 2021 (UTC)

• Registration. Fait accompli is a French word adopted into English. Please use italics. See Glossary of French expressions in English - it says "usually printed in italics".
• Enforcement. If you decide to use reiters in italics, then it needs to be consistent (italics or no italics). See Terms section.
• Enforcement. Possessive: edicts prohibition . edict's prohibition.
• Enforcement. Pronoun agreement: entry to their royal governor > entry to its royal governor. (La Rochelle is an "it" not a "their".)
• Enforcement. Full names: Provide full names for these if possible: Sommerive, Montbrun and d'Acier.
• Court politics. Not clear: "The balance on the royal council, which had favoured the moderate faction, began to swing, with the Cardinal of Lorraine's return and the Duke of Anjou, who controlled the crowns army, falling into his orbit." When you write "falling into his orbit" who are you referring to? Whose orbit? Possessive: crowns > crown's.
• Court politics. Full name (if possible): Chancellor Hopital.
• Court politics. Possessive. the courts policy direction > the court's policy direction.
• Huguenot actions. Not clear: "however he meekly stated he could". Who is "he"? If it is the king, suggest: "however the king meekly stated he could".

Start class

Change from C class to Start class. B2=yes (coverage and accuracy) but B2=no (Grammar and style). Fixing the above issues will move it to B class. Djmaschek (talk) 03:58, 6 October 2021 (UTC)

B class. The rewritten sentences are good and fixes were made. I made a few other minor edits. Djmaschek (talk) 01:44, 8 October 2021 (UTC)