Talk:Grey heron/GA1

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Reviewer: FunkMonk (talk · contribs) 00:48, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

  • Hi, I'll review this soon. FunkMonk (talk) 00:48, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • At first glance, I can see there are superior, featured photos on Commons that are not used, and could probably replace some here. There could be a close up of the head under description, for example.
Head image beside description text; found a decent flight image (with some difficulty: the finest photos are disjoint from the encyclopaedically useful ones, unfortunately). Chiswick Chap (talk) 06:50, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • Likewise, the video in the article seems short and pointless compared to these two:[1][2]
Replaced. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:27, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • There could be some information about evolution, and more on taxonomic history. Synonyms?
No synonyms that I could find. Have added some evolution and taxonomy. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:27, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • The last ref is not formatted.
removed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 06:47, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "thumb|In flight" Seems like an image has gone missing under Distribution and habitat.
removed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 06:50, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • The culture section mentions what the animal symbolised for some cultures, but could be nice to see what attributes gave it this reputation.
That would be guesswork, worse luck. Chiswick Chap (talk) 06:47, 19 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The scapular feathers are elongated, but are not as long as the wings" But is this otherwise common in birds?
I think the elongation is unusual. If you look at the main image you will see that the scapulars dangle down rather like a cape and are much longer than those of most birds. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:15, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
I mean is it unusual that they are not as long as the wings? Seems like a given that they wouldn't be as long. Does the source make this wording? FunkMonk (talk) 09:36, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
The source mentioned the point but I have removed the phrase as superfluous. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 12:24, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The Australian white-faced heron is often incorrectly called a grey heron.[5] In Ireland, the grey heron is often colloquially called a "crane"." Perhaps this makes more sense in another section than description?
Moved. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:15, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "attributable to contemporary genera" Contemporary could be unclear here, perhaps better to say extant or modern.
Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 12:24, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "This subfamily includes the herons and egrets, the green herons, the pond herons, the night herons and a few other species" Groups mentioned could need links.
Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 12:24, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The range of the nominate subspecies" Might not be clear to most readers what this means.
Clarified. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 12:26, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • The copyright of cropped (or otherwise modified) images does not transfer to the cropper, so the info here should be changed:[3]
Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 13:06, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • The short paragraph about flight in the middle of description seems like it would belong with the first paragraph under behaviour.
Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:35, 22 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "In the United Kingdom, breeding starts in late February or March." What about elsewhere?
Done. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:34, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The oldest recorded bird lived for twenty-three years" Wild or captive?
The source does not specify. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:34, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Such behaviour has been noted in zoos in Vienna, London and Amsterdam.[14][15][16]" Locations seem a bit arbitrarily chosen. It's probably common in most zoos that are near to where they live, I've seen it in Copenhagen Zoo as well.
Removed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:32, 22 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Being large birds, grey herons have few predators as adults, being well able to defend" A bit repetitive.
Trimmed. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:34, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The surnames Earnshaw, Hernshaw, Herne, and Heron" From where?
Done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:30, 22 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Roast heron was once a specially-prized dish for special occasions such as state banquets." Where? Seems only UK examples are mentioned.
Said "in Britain". Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:30, 22 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • "creatures which it spears with its beak" I doubt that it "spears" the prey, and this wording isn't used in the article body either.
Removed. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:34, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • You write one metre in the intro but 100 cm in the article, could be consistent.
The lead is just a summary of the main text, and I would put "up to a metre" in the lead if the average height mentioned in the article was something close to that, say 98cm or 104cm. I don't see consistency being important here. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:34, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ok, looks fine to me, so will pass. FunkMonk (talk) 15:07, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for the review. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 17:11, 23 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
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