Talk:Big brown bat/GA1

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GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: Dunkleosteus77 (talk · contribs) 17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for taking this on! Enwebb (talk) 13:43, 14 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Dunkleosteus77[edit]

  • You shouldn't wikilink continents and countries per wp:overlink   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • done
  • The lead seems exceptionally large for an article of this size, and I see a lot of possible trimming areas. For example, "Like all bats in the US, the big brown bat can be impacted by rabies, though some individuals have immunity against the virus. They test positive for the virus infrequently. In 2011, only 3.8%[4] of big brown bats submitted for testing were positive for rabies, even though sick bats are more likely to be submitted, as healthy bats avoid humans" this doesn't really belong in the lead. For the lead, you can just cut it down to "Big brown bats can carry rabies, though they test positive for the virus infrequently"   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • Okay, simplified that last part.
That was just an example. The lead is too big   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  04:35, 17 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Condensed Enwebb (talk) 14:50, 17 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • There seems to be something missing from taxonomic history. Do you know why Beauvois gave it the name Vespertila fuscus? What does Vespertila fuscus translate to? Why is it now classified in the genus Eptesicus and when did this happen?   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • I'm not sure what you mean by this first question. He gave it that name as a binomial to describe it. In the speciesbox I have a note that Vespertila has been speculated to be a misprint of Vespertilio, is that what you mean? Vespertilio was a catch-all genus for earliest described bat species. I'll see if I can find when the original combination was first used. Enwebb (talk) 13:43, 14 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
      • I found a source for that and added it in.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 19:39, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
      • I added more detail about the taxonomy including first use of the present combination. Enwebb (talk) 14:50, 17 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • "...morphological features did not agree with genetic lineages, and thus were not reliable in distinguishing the two subspecies. Individuals with eastern and western US genetic lineages co-occurred in the same colonies, however" I don't understand what this means   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • "...the greatest length of skull is approximately 19.25 mm (0.758 in" is "the greatest length of" really necessary here?   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Be consistent with using either snout or rostrum   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Why'd you specifically say "that rarely eats moths" (especially when you didn't list moths as one of the insects it eats)?   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • I just removed the last part of that sentence.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 19:41, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Who're Kurta and Kunz?   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • "most can be found in warm human-man structures" I fixed this but I just thought it was funny   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • " although John O. Whitaker and William John Hamilton 'suspect [the bats] are capable of living much longer.' " The way you say this makes it sound so suspicious. Also, why do you sometimes say "a 1995 study" and then other times call out people by name (by the way, if you call out people by name, include their full name and occupation, otherwise it just sounds random)   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • removed names
  • Why "Pleistocene" bat?   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • Because it's part of the quote I'm using from those authors. Removing it would change the meaning of the quote and wouldn't be good form. Enwebb (talk) 13:46, 14 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Just because you used direct quote doesn’t mean people can understand what you’re saying. Are you trying to say it’s the most widespread bat that evolved in the Pleistocene or the most widespread bat during the Pleistocene? If the latter, juxtaposing it as a direct quote with “is encountered widely throughout North America” makes for a really clumsy transition   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  04:35, 17 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
This is the last comment   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  14:23, 18 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks, I took a stab at clarifying the meaning here. Enwebb (talk) 14:36, 18 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • The discussion on white-nose syndrome should go under Disease, not Conservation, because it is, after all, a disease   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • I disagree, as it is a disease that doesn't really affect it, though it is a serious concern for many other bats in the range. I'm mostly using it as a foil here. Enwebb (talk) 13:43, 14 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Also, the part about testing positive infrequently to rabies should also go under Disease   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  17:48, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    • I also disagree, as I'm specifically referring to it in its capacity as a rabies vector, which is a human health issue. Enwebb (talk) 13:43, 14 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
it’s more for organizational purposes because the reader will first look under the section called Disease for info on rabies   User:Dunkleosteus77 |push to talk  04:35, 17 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I've renamed the sections "rabies" and "as disease vectors", which hopefully resolves this somewhat. Enwebb (talk) 14:50, 17 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]