Talk:Barbara Neely

Discussion

Testing, is this the discussion page SFSU students are going to be using? -Lperdomo — Preceding unsigned comment added by Lgperdomo • contribs) 23:22, 21 October 2011 (UTC)

Yes, if you mean a discussion about the author. Viriditas (talk) 02:51, 23 October 2011 (UTC)

Awards

Hey, STSU project partners, whoever is in charge of the awards section of our article, I found a good source that makes some more notes on awards that Neely has won.

"In 1992, Neely published her first mystery novel, Blanche on the Lam, which was widely heralded by critics. Barbara Neely won several awards such as the "Go On Girl!" Award from the Black Women's Book Club for the best debut novel, the Agatha Award and the Anthony Award for Best First Novel, and the Macavity award for Best First Mystery Novel. Over the course of the next eight years, Barbara Neely wrote three more mystery novels featuring Blanche White." I got this from http://voices.cla.umn.edu/artistpages/neelyBarbara.php so it seems like a good source to use! --Lgperdomo (talk) 16:38, 27 October 2011 (UTC)

Expansion

Not sure if this is the right place to post this since I don't see anyone else response...But I'll post it here any way and move it if I have to later. I took a look at the William Attaway page, and I think that we can definitely take some valuable ideas from what that group is doing. From what I've been reading regarding Barbara Neely, this lady was/is super involved in political movements and social-justice movements and I think if we can just have a few more categories under our page we can address a lot more interesting facts about this woman's life. So have like, "Growing up" "Career (and talk about all of her changes in career)" "Family" "Political involvement". We could add more, those are just the ones that I'm thinking of off the top of my head. I know that it may make our article look a little long, but there's so much to say about this woman I think it's definitely plausible. Also, I finished adding little paragraphs about the books, just because most of them don't have an actual article yet. Please let me know where else I can help at this point! Again, sorry if I posted this in the wrong place! --Lgperdomo (talk) 16:38, 27 October 2011 (UTC)

I took a look at Dagoberto Gilb's Wikipedia page and I noticed how their Selected Works was laid out. I really liked how they used bullet points to lay out his selected works, awards, and books section. I think that it makes it look organized and simple. I could possibly suggest that his background or biography could be more elaborated with details and maybe even add a Style section to his page. Hope I helped! Corissac (talk) 02:39, 2 November 2011 (UTC)Corissac

I looked at both Rebecca Harding Davis and William Attaway's page. I really like all the information the William Attaway's page the group seems to have a lot of the information down however I think it would flow better if they switched the family and personal life with literacy and career. Also, it would look better if they added more information on the top just to grab more attention from the readers. For the Rebecca HArding Davis, I like how the group is handling the information and how they decorated the page by adding visuals. In my group, I think as some of my group members have said add more sections like the "family" one is a good one. We have her early life but not her present life... she's not dead so we should incorporate where she is now. Also, it would help our page if we had visuals other than her picture. Lastly, we can add more to the box where her information is to be more attracting to the reader. Hope this helps! (User talk:lindammunoz) Lindammunoz (talk) 05:28, 3 November 2011 (UTC)

I looked at William Attaway's page and thought it was a good start. I think it was interesting that they included the major influences on him when he was younger which could be useful to include in our early life/bio section. They're information seemed very focused and to the point which i think is really important. However, I think that the way we broke our page up into more sections makes it a lot easier for us to have various sections of focused information that gives our article a much more finished feel. (Katebelknap (talk) 06:54, 8 November 2011 (UTC))

Ok for the second round of looking at other groups pages I focused on Davis page. I'm particularly interested in the way they're treating their "Major Works" section. I think we need to break up "Publishing career" because half of what is included in that would be better suited under the Major Works section. For Publishing Career maybe we could focus on any difficulties Neely might have had in getting her work published either because of the content, because she was a woman, or because she was African american. I would like to make this change, but I don't want to step on any toes, so let me know what you guys think! --Lgperdomo (talk) 08:04, 8 November 2011 (UTC)

I looked at the Rebecca Harding Davis page. I liked the way they broke up her biography and how they did the "personal and family life" section. I also thought that it was good how they had a whole section on her works and an analysis of "Life on the Iron Mills", however I did mention that they focused too much on that particular piece and that maybe they should do more research on her other works since she did have an extensive collection of short stories, books, and some essays. As for ours, I wish there was more stuff out there on Barbara Neely that wasn't so repetitive. Andreanamv (talk) 7:07am, 15 November 2011 (UTC)

Works

I've added a cleanup tag to the "Works" section. On Wikipedia, we generally discriminate between appendices such as a "Bibliography" or list of works and a section about their "Works" or publishing career. Obviously, there is some ambiguity over their use as either a major section or as an appendix, but GA and FA articles often use works as a major subject heading and bibliography as an appendix, although this can vary widely. Viriditas (talk) 06:44, 28 October 2011 (UTC)

Moved works to talk page

I've moved this information to the talk page. This particular article is about Barbara Neely, and should focus more on her publishing career, her literary style, and touch briefly on the critical reception of her work. If anything, the material below could be merged into new stub articles on her novels. Viriditas (talk) 07:04, 28 October 2011 (UTC)

Removed material

Blanche on the Lam opens with Blanche standing in front of a judge, pleading her case over some bad checks. Barely listening to Blanche's request, the judge sentences her to thirty days in jail. In the midst of some courthouse confusion Blanche escapes and seeks refuge at a home of a wealthy family for whom she was scheduled to work as a housecleaner. On the job, she joins the family and retreats to the countryside expecting a simple life, but instead finds herself in the middle of a mysterious mess of murder and deception."

In Barbara Neely's second novel, Blanche Among the Talented Tenth, we again journey with Blanche White through her investigations of a puzzling murder. In this novel Blanche embarks on a ten-day excursion to Amber Cove, a wealthy and exclusive black settlement in the state of Maine. Upon her arrival, she discovers that her dark skin and occupation as a domestic worker are objects of scorn in the predominately light skinned upper class community. Blanche enters the community shortly after the somewhat suspicious death of Faith Brown, a woman known to have been blackmailing several residents in the town. Blanche takes it upon herself to investigate the murder."

In the third novel, Blanch Cleans Up, Blanch “takes a job as a cook for a local political family as a favor for a friend. She sees a wife's fragile sorrow, a son's estrangement, and a father's unending desire to become the next governor. A string of deaths in the neighborhood all seem to lead back to the family's house. Blanche goes on to resolve what turns out to be several murders connected to sex, disgrace, and heartbreak. All of this is done while she is raising her teenage niece and nephew as her own, and trying to keep their hopes and futures safe.”

In the fourth novel, Blanch Passes Go, Blanch has retired from housekeeping work. “In this story, Blanche's mission is deeply personal as she seeks vengeance from David Palmer, the white man who raped her eight years prior. Using a friend's catering business and a network of informants, Blanche slowly uncovers the history of her rapist, as well as the truth behind the unsolved murder of a young white woman. The novel displays Blanche at her most vulnerable: confronting a horrifying memory and reconciling her past while trying to maintain her life as a strong, independent Black woman.”

References

Suggestions

You definitely need to rewrite the article to eliminate typos, clumsy sentences, etc. I'm surprised the "detective" narrative doesn't play a more prominent role in your "Literary Style" section. Also, might be good to add a section on "Themes." Again, take a look at good model pages like this one on Stephen Crane. Can you dig up anymore information about sales? or about legacy/reception of her work? Profhanley (talk) 17:07, 15 November 2011 (UTC)

Good Article

This review is transcluded from Talk:Barbara Neely/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Puffin (talk · contribs) 09:56, 4 December 2011 (UTC)

Rate	Attribute	Review Comment
1. Well-written:
	1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct.	First of all, you do not nominate an article for GA while a maintenance tag is still up. You do need additional sources for verification. In the infobox, murder mystery needs a capital letter for murder. The grammar could be improved, I suggest asking for a copy edit at WP:GOCE.
	1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.	The lead needs to be extended, it does not really summarise the article. ", a middle-aged mother" How old is "middle aged?" Please clarify! ""Blanche allows Neely to explore the female beauty" Please clarify, or provide a citation. This is likely to be challenged. "popularly known as Pennsylvania Dutch" This is a peacock term" Popularly is a peacock term, please re word this. "producing various shows" Avoid the word various, it is too vague. Please clarify this.
2. Verifiable with no original research:
	2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline.	Inline citations belong directly after the punctuation, where you left a space. Use {{cite web}} for web references, not just bare ref tags. Web references need the author, publisher, publishing date and access date Be consistent on if you put retrieved in capitals. (You should put the "R" in capital" e.g: Retrieved not retreived) Use {{cite book}} for book references.
	2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose).	Ref 1 - Needs publishing date Ref 3 - Needs publishing date and page number(s). Ref 4 - Has a cite error, please sort it out. Ref 6 7 8 and 9 - Needs page numbers Ref 11 and 12 - Need access date. Ref 13 - Needa author, publisher and publishing date. You need to name your references. "Barbara Neely enjoyed a wide range of authors such as P.D. James Chester Himes, and Walter Mosley but the one author that inspired her the most was Toni Morrison. She used her as a model of what she wanted to become. She saw what Morrison did with the experiences of black woman to tell stories of ordinary people and tried to mimic the same style" Unsourced, please provide a citation.
	2c. it contains no original research.	Maybe, some things are unsourced and need citations.
3. Broad in its coverage:
	3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.	Possibly, but what month was she born? Can you get information like this to improve the accuracy of the article?
	3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).
	4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
	5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
	6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content.	It would help to include an image, but it doesn't matter if you can't.
	6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.
	7. Overall assessment.	This article is not currently ready for good article status, so I will not be listing it at this time. Please consider the points raised above and after working on it, take it to WP:Peer review and then please renominate at WP:GAN. I'm afraid this article is quite a long way off of GA status, you need to fix these issues.

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