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User:0703jiveyjane/Hashimoto's thyroiditis/Hotmamallama Peer Review

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General info

[edit]
Whose work are you reviewing?

0703jiveyjane

Link to draft you're reviewing
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:0703jiveyjane/Hashimoto's_thyroiditis?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
Hashimoto's thyroiditis

Evaluate the drafted changes

[edit]

Lead:

§  We think Secular trends were a great lead to add for this topic


Content:

§  Last paragraph for Geographic Influence: after Iodine Deficiency Disorder add (IDD) this way it will be understood what you are referencing later in the paragraph

§  Add links to major/common diseases referenced in article: Multiple Sclerosis, Type1 Diabetes


Tone:

§  Are there statistics that reference underdeveloped versus developed countries?


Sources:

§  We were able to follow the references page very easily. The sub marks of numbers representing what references go where in the article were marked accurately.


We feel you guys did a very great job for this first draft! Well put together with exemplary statistic and input 