Talk:Grace Prendergast/GA1
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Reviewer: Harper J. Cole (talk · contribs) 17:46, 17 July 2021 (UTC)
I'll take on this review, as part of the July 2021 Backlog Drive.--Harper J. Cole (talk) 17:46, 17 July 2021 (UTC)
Lead
[edit]- [and the current[a] (2019) world champion] I'd suggest moving the note to after the (2019), as it serves as an explanation for the 2019 champion being current.
- I think you should wikilink coxless pair and eight as they relate directly to her profession. (Based on Wikipedia:Manual of Style/Lead section#Contextual links)
- [She hails from Christchurch] A bit informal for Wikipedia. Simply, "comes from" should be fine.
Career
[edit]- [(coxless four and eight)] Wikilink both of these.
- Wikilink quad scull.
- [she defended her national championship title with the eight.] Here "in the eight" sounds more natural (though there may be language conventions relating to rowing I'm not aware of).
- [she came fourth in a four] Similarly, I'd expect, "fourth in the four".
- [displaced them to the bronze medal] --> "displaced them to the bronze medal position"
- [where Gowler, and Prendergast] No comma after Gowler.
- [They took out the world championship title] Again, a bit informal: I suggest simply, "They won the..."
- [in a world-best time.] I'm a bit confused by this phrase - does it mean they set a world record?
- [won gold in coxless pair] --> "won gold in the coxless pair"
- [and took out another silver] --> "and won another silver"
- [Those silver medals qualified both boat classes] --> "Those silver medals qualified them in both boat classes"
- [and took out one national title] --> "and won one national title"
- [it came as a big disappointment to Gowler and Prendergast] Citation need for this.
- [they became world champions] Maybe worth mentioning the margin of victory for big achievements like World Champion gold? That goes for her 2019 golds as well.
- Wikilink Lake Karapiro
- [With the coxless pair (with Dyke) and the eight] --> "In the coxless pair (with Dyke) and the eight"
- The "Career" section is running quite long for a single section - I'd suggest creating a couple of subsections, e.g. "Early career" and "Renewed success" starting with her 2017 world gold, or whatever seems a natural break to you.
Summary
[edit]- Nothing too major. It's possible that I've made errors due to my limited knowledge of rowing, in which case feel free to disregard. I'll await your response on the above.--Harper J. Cole (talk) 20:17, 17 July 2021 (UTC)
- That's excellent – thank you. It's really good to have a non-topic expert proof-read your work. You've picked up a few things that aren't straightforward and I've explained in footnotes what the background is. I've worked my way through your feedback in batches and whenever something needed explaining, I've done so in an edit summary. Your preference may be that this should, in addition, be recorded here so that we've got a record of this. Or you might say that what I've done is fine. All in all, I've expanded the lead, provided some wikilinks, reworded some passages, provided an additional reference, explained two things in footnotes and expanded the article a little bit. Thank you for your good suggestions. Please say whether anything else ought to be attended to. Schwede66 21:21, 17 July 2021 (UTC)
- Looking good! I've read through the explanations, so there's no need to replicate them here. Interesting that there are no world records in rowing, that wouldn't have occurred to me. I shall promote to GA status: thanks for an interesting read,--Harper J. Cole (talk) 00:19, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
- Not all that's going on in rowing is straightforward. What I found interesting is that the relevant article is called List of world records in rowing, which mentions in the first sentence that there are no world records. That article name appears to be wrong, eh? Thanks again for your good work reviewing this. Schwede66 00:37, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
- Looking good! I've read through the explanations, so there's no need to replicate them here. Interesting that there are no world records in rowing, that wouldn't have occurred to me. I shall promote to GA status: thanks for an interesting read,--Harper J. Cole (talk) 00:19, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
- That's excellent – thank you. It's really good to have a non-topic expert proof-read your work. You've picked up a few things that aren't straightforward and I've explained in footnotes what the background is. I've worked my way through your feedback in batches and whenever something needed explaining, I've done so in an edit summary. Your preference may be that this should, in addition, be recorded here so that we've got a record of this. Or you might say that what I've done is fine. All in all, I've expanded the lead, provided some wikilinks, reworded some passages, provided an additional reference, explained two things in footnotes and expanded the article a little bit. Thank you for your good suggestions. Please say whether anything else ought to be attended to. Schwede66 21:21, 17 July 2021 (UTC)