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GA Review

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GA toolbox
Reviewing
This review is transcluded from Talk:Don Blasingame/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 12:05, 8 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Shall be reviewing as part of the GAN Backlog Drive of April to May 2020. MWright96 (talk) 12:05, 8 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

General

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  • Hyphens should be replaced by en dashes (–) per MOS:DASH

Lead

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  • "He made his debut for the team in September of 1955" - the date should be written as September 1955 per MOS:DATESNO
  • "He made it to the World Series with the Reds his first year" - can be changed to say either during his first year or in his first year
  • "he lost the second base job to Pete Rose" - how about if the word in bold is changed to role for variety?
  • "he served as a minor league coordinator for the Philadelphia Phillies after that." - afterward.

Early life

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  • "but he went off to serve in the United States Army for a couple years during the Korean War." - please state how many years exactly that Blasingame spent in the U.S. Army
  • "During his offseasons in 1953 and 1954, Blasingame attended David Lipscomb College in Nashville, Tennessee." - think this sentence should be further rewritten to pass WP:LIMITED

Minor league career

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  • "Next season, he went to spring training with the Buffaloes." - For the following season,
  • "He suffered a couple injuries in spring training," - should that he changed to say suffered two injuries
  • "the nickname would follow him the rest of his career." - him for the
  • "earning a September call-up to the big league Cardinals." - try not to use the term "big league" as it is informal

St. Louis Cardinals

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  • "Then, June 14," - on June 14,
  • "His first home run finally came May 12," - better; His first home run eventually came on May 12,
  • "Another highlight came June 12 that year," - came on June 12
  • "getting named to the named to the National League All-Star team for the only time in his career." - getting named to the
  • "August 6, he had four hits and two RBI in an 8-7 victory over the San Francisco Giants." - how about He had four hits and two RBI in an 8–7 victory over San Francisco Giants on August 6.?
  • Wikilink Sports Illustrated
  • "and drove in two runs June 9 in a 12-3 victory over Milwaukee." - during a June 9 12–3 victory over Milwaukee.
  • "also against Milwaukee." - over for variety

San Francisco Giants and Cincinnati Reds

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  • "He was only used three times in the first couple of weeks," - please state the exact number of weeks exactly
  • "May 24, he had four hits," - On May 24,
  • "over them in Game 1 of a doubleheader September 5." - doubleheader held on September 5.

Washington Senators and Kansas City Athletics

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  • "April 14, 1965, Blasingame had a two-RBI triple against Dick Radatz" - On April 14, 1965,
  • "Following September call-ups," - Following a series of call-ups in September,
    • I adjusted this slightly differently and linked it for explanation. In baseball, the major league rosters expand September 1, allowing teams to add prospects they think might be full-time players next year. I wanted to show that Blasingame was released just after this phenomenon. Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 18:26, 8 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the Athletics released him September 7." - released him on September 7.

The only hit

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  • "giving up a double to Blasingame in a 1-0 Yankee win" - how about changing the word in bold to relinquishing for variety?

Playing style

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  • "Blasingame four times finished in the Top 10 in the NL in steals" - the text in bold can be moved to the end of this statement since it is more gramatically correct
  • "(a stat that attempts to predict how many more wins a team would have because of the fielding of one of its players)" - statstic

Player and manager in Japan

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  • "“We ran over obstacle courses for a week - the pair of quotation marks highlighted in bold are unneeded
  • "However, the trade netted Hanshin" - more formal; earned
  • "His managerial record was 180-208-28 (Japanese baseball allows for ties).[1][4][3]" - refs in numerical order please

Late career

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Personal life

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  • "Kent played minor league baseball for three seasons, including a couple in the Phillies' organization." - please state where possible how many seasons exactly
  • "the family split the year living there and in the United States." - divided

References

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  • Reference 3 is missing Associated Press as the agency that provided the story
  • References 20 and 60 are missing the page numbers that the respective stories can be found on
  • Reference 47 is dead and requires archiving
  • The same reference is missing the date it was published and the author who wrote it

Will be putting the review on hold to allow the nominator to action/respond to the queries raised above. MWright96 (talk) 15:36, 8 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]